Things I Learned at the Yoga Retreat

A different kind of get away

Nestled in the Appalachian and next door to the Smokey Mountains are 126 beautiful, maybe even magical acres of trees, springs-so-clean it’s nearly obscene, waterfalls, paths, and nearby national parks. A 4-generation ownership (originally German immigrants) honors the land and wilderness by leaving a very small footprint of human meddling and using sustainable methods developed by the “back to the land” movement. Though the area has seen cattle, chickens, vegetable, and herb gardens as well as a landscape business, the land’s faithful guardians have planted thousands of native and perennial plants as well as implemented a meadow restoration project. In keeping with a natural connectedness to the earth, yurts sporting earth colors and patterns appear like giant mushrooms dotting the landscape. These human abodes void of AC or indoor plumbing are spacious and inviting; early morning and evening breezes enter through windows and mosquito-netted openings to circulate around high-ceiling interiors. The first impression one has is of stumbling into a secret garden where peacefulness and ancient wisdom prevail.

It was my first yoga retreat, and I didn’t know what to expect. Would I be surrounded by earth mommas expertly assuming esoteric yoga positions I had never attempted nor even heard of? Would the plant-based diet (all-inclusive – yay, no meals to prepare!), send my usually hardy but carnivorous system into uncomfortable and embarrassing withdrawal?  Would I be the oldest and far from wisest one there? Might I, as a lone traveler witness a cliquish splintering into tight little factions that would feel like some kind of “Lady of the Flies” experience? Worse yet, could I succumb to an anxiety attack with no AC, TV and limited Wi-Fi connection? All these reasons not to go rattled around in my brain as I prepared for and embarked on my journey.

I’m not writing this as a travelogue sort of thing, nor am I trying to create a marketable ad for yoga retreats. I just want to share some interesting things I learned as I came to realize so much of what I was drawn to as a young woman had fallen to the wayside over the years with school, work, and family. I had not allowed myself a total immersion in something I loved for some time, taking instead stolen moments of guilt-ridden self-indulgences - who was I to waste time and money on a massage or some such silliness…oh, yes, I forgot to mention the retreat had incomparable 90-minute massages for the taking!

Apart from the slow-go but challenging sessions in the yoga shala, morning and afternoon circle time, a guided meditation accompanied by a sound bath, a mystical labyrinth experience, cacao ceremony, nature and plant walks, and amazing food (did I mention organic, vegetarian meals prepared by an Ayurvedic Chef?), there arose within me a compelling reason to create something new and reconnect with The Sacred Feminine.

Before I go off on too many tangents as I am likely to do, my intention is to simply answer the questions I posed in the beginning, share a song of ancient wisdom that made me cry (showing vulnerability is no easy feat for me…so weak…so pathetic…so ingrained in me to whistle in the dark). And last but not least, provide a link to a cool dosha quiz that gave me insight into myself and those around me. There was so much more but I am still processing it - perhaps it will become fodder for a later post.

Questions Answered. (Do you ever find yourself still trying to write to please your favorite high school and college teachers…so weird!)

1.  Would I be baffled, amazed, and shamed by earth-momma types who would display amazing feats of yoga prowess?

Baffled – no, all moves were well-explained and demonstrated. Amazed – yes, but who knew there was a bit of earth-momma in me!?  They were a happy, exceptional in beauty and mind…yet a bit odd bunch – kind of like mystical foodies. I liked them and they seemed to like me. Sigh of relief.

2.  Would I get the shits from strange new, non-meat foods?

I did not – in fact, my system felt full yet comfortable, as though it was working just as it should, something that was definitely strange and new to it and me. I especially liked the kitchari and felt like each meal was a new world of flavors, plants and blends I was fortunate to experience; it was like being a little kid trying new foods for the first time.

3.  Would I be the oldest and most unwise one there?

This is tricky to answer. I had a tarot reading where I selected only one card and it was apropos, “The Ancient,” - so the answer is yes, chronologically, I was the oldest one there. Being the oldest in a group doesn’t really bother me – I’ve always ran with a younger crowd, which I attribute to my lack of maturity and inability to meet the milestones of my proper age at the proper time. But in addition, I don’t like lengthy conversations about aches, pains, doctors, and wayward significant others which for some reason, tends to dominate my exchanges with oldsters of my generation (sorry, not sorry – I know there are exceptions, this is just my honest experience). My main worry about running with youngsters has always been, do I have the ability to “hang” (no worries about the slang and special interests – they’ve always seemed happy to share their stories and beliefs as well as enjoy a few tales from the “olden days” as long as I don’t try to be Aesop and impose some moral to the story on them). Thankfully, I found that for this time anyway, the Ancient was able to hang. As for the wisdom thing, I have decided it’s best not to compare oneself to others - we all carry our own wisdom… (or is this just my everybody gets a trophy trope!?)

4.  Would they morph into the clique-chicks I remember from my younger days, and would I find myself odd-man/woman out?

They did not, not even close. What a silly worry…for even if they did, I have never been a sweet Piggy, maybe sometimes a bit too much a Simon, but in the end, if a fight to the finish ensues, I can pretty well channel a Ralph.

5.  How would I fare without modern conveniences and distractions?

Quite well! WTF do we need with all this shit anyway?

Link to the song that made me cry:

Link to the dosha quiz:

https://webapp.chopra.com/en/public-dosha-quiz

Well, in all honesty, I suspect a yoga retreat is not for everyone (certainly not my husband who seemed to drift out of earshot whenever I was trying to convince him to come with me). I experienced lots of nature, some woo-woo, several physical challenges, but it felt so unique and wonderfully self-indulgent. It was a step-out-of-your comfort-zone moment, and I love those.

I wish for each reader, that you also find your fun, challenging and maybe even a bit unusual get away this summer (and share it here on this wonderful platform!) Thank you for reading and thank you to those who like, comment and restack my stuff. Blessed Be!